Have you ever seen a car coming from behind hitting the car in front? No points for guessing what happens next. Majority of the times, both drivers they get in arguments and sometimes to fist fights or even killing in extreme cases. Imagine, you as a passerby are seeing this and wondering – the damage on car is not even worth INR 500 and still these guys are mad with anger. I am sure it has happened many times. Isn’t it? So what happened to these people who got in rage?
If I say, its not their fault for behaving this way, I know you wouldn’t agree with me. But actually its true. It’s not the person’s fault to get in rage because the processing of his response in his mind is happening so quickly that he is not even able to realize that he has got into a fight. Did you know 93-94% decisions you take on a daily basis are unconscious in nature, which means you react without even knowing why you did so.
And this RESPONSE (Argument or Fight etc) is due to the STIMULUS (hitting the car), wherein the processing in mind is happening unconsciously, that too very rapidly.. So how do you change the response and become emotionally more stable. Well, you need to dissect the situation and understand what MEANING you are attaching to a situation. The moment you change the ‘meaning’ of a situation, your response changes. In the above example – when someone hits another person’s car – the meaning that person gives, to hitting the car is – oh, my car is damaged or how dare he hit, or what an idiot he is or there’s so much expense or there is an inconvenience etc. Now imagine, if the meaning is changed to something like – Oh, thank god, I am saved or I am glad I didn’t kill him.. Do you think the response would still be the same? No, not at all.
Often times, people get emotionally and mentally stuck because they give a very strong personal meaning to any situation in their environment and majority of the times, since we cannot control the environment, it leaves people sad or upset or angry or irritated.
And this dissection is true in every situation. Whenever we find ourselves stuck in any unresourceful situation, the meaning that we have given to the situation is negative or useless. The moment we change the meaning to a more promising one or more resourceful one, we cannot remain stuck. Change the meaning change the situation change the situation change your life!!!
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Achla is a NLP Trainer with proven abilities to coach, train and influence people. She conducts public programs for Individuals, Corporates, Teenagers & Ladies to help them take their lives to a next level of excellence through a series of tools and techniques. The diverse professional experience has honed her abilities to accept challenges yet be compassionate & cool headed. With a vibrant and infectious smile, enthusiasm and confidence radiating her persona, her aim is to transform millions of lives through her training which are full of humour, charisma, confidence and compassion.